Things have been weird recently – I’ve gone through this odd phase of playing grown up until everyone believed me. And now, well it seems I’m fucked. Adulthood is quite a hard act to turn back on…but it’s actually not all bad.
I moved in with a boy – yup, I real live one; with dirty boxers, random ass grabs and dirty jokes. I graduated, somehow. I also started taking on adult responsibilities in my scattered, haphazard jobs. But sometimes it takes an odd moment for us to realize we’re growing up. In my case, a former professor of mine asked me to come speak to his students about my experience pre and post-university as a ‘young professional.’ Young professional? Really? I’ve been hopping from job to job, internship to internship, trip to trip, experience to experience – I’m not exactly what one might traditionally call ‘young and successful.”
I wanted to make my professor proud (some of that never leaves you, I swear,) so I sat down and put some serious thought into it. The presentation went quite well, questions came rather freely and after my chat, quite a few students came up and thanked me for dropping by. “Well, I’m really only a few years older than you guys, I answered. Don’t give what I say with too much authority, bud. I’m still just figuring shit out.’ Turns out, that’s what they’d needed.
They wanted to talk to someone who was surviving every bump and tumble in the road. Someone who was still excited about the gazillions of jobs and opportunities she saw wandering around in the world. Sadly, our teachers do not provide much of that enthusiasm and optimism in class; they quickly tell us to gear up for a rough job market, tons of competition and little stability. Well I’m here to tell you that’s not how things go. Because when you’re really passionate about what you do, you work your ass off, you knock down some doors, you hit a ton of brick walls and then prove yourself to death whenever a door opens. And then you succeed.
Well… that’s what I’m counting on.
So here are a few of the thoughts that came up in my presentation and some of the ensuing discussions. A bit like Ira Glass’ “things I wish I’d known when I started radio” kind of list {it’s bloody brilliant! go check it out!!} here are a few things that might have been good and comforting to know when I was about to graduate.
PEOPLE & TIME: YOUR MOST VALUABLE CURRENCY
Here’s the deal – [and I know you know this, because baby-boomers have been telling us all their lives] – in this dog-eat-dog-eat-frog-eat-whatever the hell else is below it world; people are in no way obliged to care about you – let alone your professional future.You have a degree, that’s really great and I promise you’ll be happy to have it….but so what?
THAT is why you need to cherish people who not only inspire you, but who are willing to take an interest in your own path and experience. You will see, I promise. Having them around in time of crippling self-doubt and professional-identity-crash can literally save your life – and mind. They are pure gold, first class bling – I’m talking Wheezy-style diamond encrusted mouth piece bling.
The most incredible thing they have to offer, is their time. The time they could spend drinking, making money, enjoying family, being cool – they generously spend asking you about your progress, answering your newbie questions and introducing you to brilliant professionals. I promise you, they have better shit to do. Yet they offer so generously; make sure you soak it all up. So hold on to them tightly, check-in to see what’s happening in THEIR lives and keep them posted on your own highs and lows; they actually want to know! You will one day thank them for every opportunity they offered you to learn.
Better yet. Believe it or not, you may one day level out to be equals; two professionals in mutual admiration literally ninja rock-staring the same professional universes.
Partners in crime. They got yo’ back Big Time.
So be humble, take in every tidbit of wisdom and knowledge you can, and when you don’t get something? I mean the ‘I-really-tried-to-work-some-of-this-out-by-myself-but-what-the-hell-are-you-talking about’ kind of not knowing? ASK QUESTIONS. In fact, scratch that, if you’re even just curious about a detail, or wanting to make sure you understood something important? ASK QUESTIONS. I know we’ve been taught that asking too many questions makes us look dumb or uninformed, but in fact, it’s the opposite once you hit the real world, whatever that is. People truly appreciate honest curiosity, attention to detail and a meticulousness that has you making sure you understand every aspect of your job. For some, this may come naturally. For others, it’s a hard habit to break or a difficult skill to hone – but I promise, by asking questions, you actually manage to turn inexperience into drive, dedication and ambitious curiosity.
Which leads me to my next point. You know how we all graduate and think to ourselves; what the fuck am I supposed to say to make myself sound much smarter and more experienced than I actually am? We all do it, it’s an auto-pilot response to our impression of what employers are looking for. But I think we may have been duped somewhere down the education line. Because what I’ve seen real employers are often looking for something tons of newer workers could harness if they put some effort into it. Drive.
Every new graduate has skills he or she didn’t even know he or she had (last time I’m doing he or she by the way- ‘he’ means everyone, ok?) Think everyone in your office knows how to Tweet ? -[ Or Tweeter, as I've often heard it called] – Well they don’t. They’re not always sure what’s meant to do what when it comes to things like social media. And we do. How about those great and creative musician friends of yours? They could come in handy when the HR department is trying to throw a holiday staff party on a limited budget. Heck, there’s that great venue you go to all the time that rents its room out for cheap too. High five, newbie!
You represent both the workforce and consumer of the future, you better bet that your understanding of the world around you is valuable.
Speaking of valuable. Here’s my last one of the day.
By the time school ends, most of us have been in our brick boxes for anywhere between 10 and 30 years. For most of our academic lives, we’ve been given guidelines and grades – passes or fails. We were constantly being told where we stood and how well we were progressing. Things are quite different once you’re torn from that structure. In fact, guidelines will likely change from company to company, grades happen rarely if at all and the passes vs fails become increasingly difficult to tell apart from one another.
I loved almost every minute of school. To be honest, that’s probably because I was half decent at it – and I was a huge fan of positive reinforcement, nice grades and modest congratulations. So when I entered every odd internship; when I faked my way through another terrifying day at work or when I bowed my way through a massive mistake – I was on the lookout for my cues.
I was looking for a boss to tell me I’d done well, for a colleague to tell me I fitting in brilliantly, for someone to tell me the world would go on despite my fuck-ups. Sometimes I found the right person, sometimes I didn’t. But after a while, I stopped looking around so eagerly and started setting benchmarks and standards for myself. It turns out, your own expectations often far exceed those of others. I looked for ways to delineate my successes and failures, and I did my best to acknowledge them all. The first time I maturely managed a work-place argument, I gave myself a tap on the back. The first time I properly owned up to a mistake or a lazy overlook, I let myself drink a few beers and cheered myself up. The first time I aced an interview despite feeling like my brain had dropped into my plate of scrambled eggs, I decided to treat myself to a hair cut and a color. And the next time I stumble upon a surprising landmark of my own, I’ll find a way to mark it.
Perhaps simply by listening to this song and letting myself be a huge, dorky sap.
But really, save yourself a bit of self-esteem and start thinking about how you’ll be measuring your own success in 3 months, 6 months, 2 years. Will it be an aced interview? A wicked new project? A better work/life balance? Start thinking about it now, because you’ll be needing your game plan in no time. And that means you; Mr & Miss Graduate-to-be/Wannabe Young Professional.
Don’t worry! It’s grueling, exhausting, scary…and fun as hell.
Au plaisir,
Sarah
PS. For your viewing pleasure. Ira Glass’ address in cartoon. For all the incredible dorks in my life 
